Saturday, June 03, 2006

White Hair

Got up late for work this morning. So I was rushing around all over the place. When I came out of the bathroom, my husband was in bed reading the newspaper. I said oh you're up. He said who can get any sleep with a tornado in the same room. Then he asked if I was done with the bathroom. Told him to go ahead. I could blowdry my hair just as well in the bedroom.

When he came out of the bathroom I was still standing infront of the wardrobe trying to find something to wear. He asked if I wanted coffee. I said no I didn't have time.

It took me more than 20 minutes to decide on a suit for work. By that time he was back in bed with his newspaper. So there I was standing infront of the mirror blowdrying my hair & I caught sight of the back of his head in the mirror. And I noticed that he was starting to get some white hair. Nothing much. Just a few white hairs sprinkled here & there in the middle of all that black hair. For some weird reason that was a HUGE turn-on. I literally went weak. Don't ask me why. Have long since given up trying to make any sense of the intricate workings of my own libido.

Of course he noticed the sudden stillness. And turned to see what I was doing. So I kissed him. Don't know. Just seemed like the right thing to do at the time. In the next instant I was in his lap on top of the newspaper making out. He stopped to ask what got into me. So I told him. And he said ok did I want to be late for work & see what else he could do to turn me on? Did I WANT to?Boy did I want to! But I couldn't damn it. So in an effort to change the mood I asked him why he was saying that didn't he think my career was important? Apparently he was in no mood to get into a discussion about the relative importance of our careers etc....so he ignored that for a few more minutes. Then he told me to get up & get out before he changed his mind. I wanted to say but I want you to change your mind!

Didn't though. I got up & was straightening out my hair & trying to locate my bag & my car keys when he said don't forget your jacket. Oh yeah. I actually couldn't remember at what point in the proceedings my jacket came off. But replaying recent events to pinpoint exactly when & how was not really in anyone's best interests right about then. Not if I was to have a snowball's chance in hell of getting to the office before my manager.

So I put it back on & said goodbye on my way out. No response. He was back behind that newspaper. I said why won't you look at me. He said imshi itla3i bara(get out of here) - still without looking. So I did. To discover on the way down that high heels & weak knees don't go very well together.

The mirror in the lift on the way down told me that I had newspaper ink all over the back of my white jacket not to mention that it was crumpled. Perfect. Way too late to do anything about it though. Besides I didn't trust myself to go back up there & come back down.

The drive to work. I haven't seen the actual statistics but I would guess that sexual frustration is probably not a great contributing factor to road safety.

Conversation with a traffic police car that suddenly materialized next to me in the carpark infront of my office.

Traffic cop: Salamu 3laikum (Islamic greeting)
Me: Wa3alaikum elsalam (Returning said greeting)
Traffic cop: 3assa ma shar? (I hope nothing is wrong)
Me: Khair inshallah? (God willing everything is fine)
Traffic cop: Ish fi? (What is going on?)
Me(taking off my sunglasses to fix him with wide innocent eyes): Ish fi? (Repeating his question)
Traffic cop: Misir3a wu safa ghalat wu ma t3arfeen ish fi? (You're speeding & you're parked incorrectly & you don't know what's going on?)
Me: Tayeb shasawi ya3ni ma-shi parking (What can I do there's no parking)
Traffic cop: Wilsur3a? Tsoogeen birally allah yihadeech? (And the speed? Do you think this is a rally & a prayer to Allah to guide me)
Me: Ta'akhart 3ala dawami (Am late for work)
Traffic cop: Allah yihadach bas. Ya bint el7alal salamtich wu salamat ghairich wayid aham min eldawam (He's asking Allah to guide me again & adding that my safety & the safety of other people is much more important than work)
Me: Ana asfa (Am sorry)
Traffic cop: 3ateena el-lesan wilmilkiya allah yikhaleech (License & registration please)

Terrific. A ticket. Another one. But he was a nice guy. He let me get away with parking where am not supposed to. He said I didn't have to move. He was still writing out my ticket when my manager called & asked where I was. Told him I was in the middle of getting a ticket because in my mad dedication to getting to work on time I had become a public menace. Was hoping that would soften him up. No such luck. He told me that he'd sent some people to my office who'd been waiting for the last 30 min to have the benefit of my expertise if it wasn't disrupting my social life too much. Never mind that I was only late for 10 min & he had no business sending people to see me before work hours anyway.

And disrupting my social life? The jerk.

The meeting went on & on. Almost 3 hrs. When it was done I had a horrible, splitting headache. That's something else that sexual frustration does. With me a headache doesn't mean am not in the mood. Quite the contrary. It means am feeling deprived. I ordered Turkish coffee no sugar & took 2 Panadols. A bit later I decided I needed a cigarette. Opened the drawer to check my secret stash. Was kind of proud of myself. The packet had only 3 gone. And it's been there since I got back to work after the miscarriage. I thought I deserved two.

Long, long day. Still 30 minutes to go. About an hour ago D. called. She was mad at her bf(my uncle) & she was ranting on & on about what foul creatures men were & how much they controlled our lives. Just what I needed. Feminism always gets me out of the mood - which is good right?

Men who controlled my life today:

1) My husband
2) My manager
3) The traffic cop

Labels:

27 Comments:

Blogger Mumbo Jumbo said...

When my husband and I first started dating, we were in the car one day on the way to dinner and I was starting at him, admiring him, hoping he wouldn't notice.

I was kind of examining his features. i then noticed some white hairs on the side... man, did it turn me on! I surprised myself. I had never found white hair attractive before... now he almost has no hair left!!! :D

6/03/2006 08:46:00 PM  
Blogger roora said...

That was funny:) ]

but sorry for the question, what if anyone is turned on and he/she is not married?
and why would it make frustration after all ?

6/03/2006 09:21:00 PM  
Blogger Shams said...

i hate white hairs , i do not find them sexy, i got my first white hair when i was 18.

but u know alot of women find white hair sexy!

"what if anyone is turned on and he/she is not married?"

what are you on with this question :D

6/04/2006 05:02:00 AM  
Blogger LouLou said...

Gilgamish,

Like Mumbo Jumbo I never found white hair sexy. That was the first time. It seems you can't really predict what you're going to find sexy at a given time.

Roora,


"but sorry for the question, what if anyone is turned on and he/she is not married?
and why would it make frustration after all ?"

Am not sure I understand your question. Explain?

6/04/2006 12:55:00 PM  
Blogger roora said...

never mind. I was wondering if that could be frustrating to that extent

6/04/2006 03:05:00 PM  
Blogger maxxedout said...

Does baldness turn u on too by any chance ?
I'm starting to lose it here !

6/04/2006 05:28:00 PM  
Blogger GC said...

roora said: "what if anyone is turned on and he/she is not married?"

there are a variety of solutions to that particular issue, some utilising certain battery operated devices.

6/04/2006 08:36:00 PM  
Blogger LouLou said...

Global,

I don't think Roora's question was about solutions. She was just wondering if people who don't have experience or are not in a physical relationship feel the same level of frustration if they get turned on.


Maxxed Out,

Baldness does look sexy on some men.

6/04/2006 09:13:00 PM  
Blogger Alina said...

Roora, I think the level of frustration might it theory be the same, yet you wouldn't know what exactly to blame your mood on...

Lou, this was a very funny post! I was never in this situation (to be late for work), but one day K got there a little late..Well, who cares, he does not really have a boss to keep track of that! :)
As for white hairs, I dunno, when they are just a few, spread over black hair, I might say I get your point.

6/04/2006 09:34:00 PM  
Blogger Forsoothsayer said...

lou, ir ur husband ever finds this blog he will freak :)

6/05/2006 02:50:00 AM  
Blogger LouLou said...

If ANYONE finds this blog I will kill myself. Anyone not virtual I mean. Isn't it funny how I delete old posts for being too revealing then I end up writing new ones that are even more personal?

6/05/2006 08:22:00 AM  
Blogger Alluring said...

I make my fiance dye his white hairs; it turns me off!
As do bald men (sorry maxxed) i looked and looked and finally found an egyptian in his early 30s with all his hair intact, took me years!

Loulou, work can always wait, if you were an hour late whats the worse that could've happened? girl, never give up a chance like that, sex when you're this turned on AND at the spur of the moment, equals the sex you had all week!

To roora,

Women, even when they're sexually frustrated can hold themselves (look at loulou and she's married) if it was her husband, or even a single guy, the world might as while burn down but he wouldn't miss that chance!

6/05/2006 12:29:00 PM  
Blogger Puppy said...

I always wondered why you people are writing these personal things online. What makes you write that? Personally I really like your blog, Loulou and it’s interesting for me to read it as I see different people in different countries and the way they live. VERY interesting indeed.
But by writing such things, u people creating an additional risk for yourself? So something that makes you write that is more important than the risk u have assessed. I wonder what could be more important than your personal life? Or there is a question of probability of revealing it?

Thanks,

Puppy

6/05/2006 12:30:00 PM  
Blogger programmer craig said...

LouLou, don't worry, I think you're husband would gte a big ego boost if he read this post... as long as nobody else he knew did :)

6/05/2006 12:38:00 PM  
Blogger LouLou said...

Puppy,

Your personal life is only personal to you & to people who know you as a person, whose lives overlap yours & are affected by it in some way. To others it's just a story. And we're all pretty similar creatures who lead pretty similar lives. As you can see from the comments none of my experiences are particularly holy or unique or earth-shattering events. Blogging cures you of thinking you're very special or taking yourself too seriously because you see that everything you ever went through someone else went through & probably handled better.

For me the struggle to keep my personal life out of what I write is a lost & pointless one. I write BECAUSE of my personal life. Not because I have literary ambitions. Not because I think I'll change the world with my writing. Not because I enjoy writing for its own sake. Because it helps me to get things out of my system, organize my thoughts & focus on my daily life. Period. So if writing can't do that for me I wouldn't bother with it at all.

Is there a risk? Maybe but so far I feel the risk is manageable. Life is full of risks. I mean I used to keep handwritten diaries. I ended up with a huge box full of notebooks. And finding a hiding place for it became a major headache. Keeping it at home meant I had to drag it along with me everytime I had to travel or spend the night outside.

Now they're locked up in a cupboard in my office. Technically the staff manual says everything on company premises belongs to the company so theoretically they could decide to search my office anytime & they would have the right to read anything I keep there. Unlikely but possible.

Typing saves paper & space. I could have kept my diary in offline files. But then at work others have access to my computer.
And who can guarantee that my husband or friends won't ever touch my laptop for whatever reason?What if I forget it somewhere?

The risk is always there. And I have to write to stay sane so I guess I have to take the risk.

6/05/2006 08:31:00 PM  
Blogger Highlander said...

Loulou , sometimes a look, an expression or even a word may make me want to run into that person's arms :) but Alluring may have a point when she says that women can hide the frustration more ....

6/05/2006 08:40:00 PM  
Blogger maxxedout said...

hey i'm NOT bald
i'm balding ... big difference !!

6/05/2006 09:27:00 PM  
Blogger LouLou said...

Craig,

So in his place you'd take it as a compliment? I wish I could be sure that would be his reaction. It's a really nice thought.:)

Alluring,

My husband knows I have a terror of not measuring up at work. That's why he didn't push me harder. Of course then I spent the whole day wishing he'd pushed me harder & wondering why men ever take no for an answer.

Highlander,

Women hide frustration better because we have more practice hiding & suppressing our sexuality. Just like men are less likely to express emotions. It's social conditioning.

6/05/2006 10:04:00 PM  
Blogger Puppy said...

Loulou,

Thank you for your reply. The thing is that I used to write my thoughts in electronic diary too, but it was 6 years ago. I was writing my feelings about something negative happened to me, I mean when I was down I was opening my laptop and writing down what happened, why, who in my opinion is guilty. After a while I found out that the diary is full of pain and I don’t need to collect bad thoughts and memories so I deleted the file.

After a while I had a friend with who I was sharing everything that was happening to me plus my thoughts and it was really good, as u say I was kinda uploading my system and organizing it. I already forgot how good it was, the urge to share and understanding that someone is interested and shares back. Then somehow it was over too like a first diary. When something nice was happening I was writing it down by habbit, and instead of pushing SEND I was pushing delete. And now I don’t feel like sharing with anyone.

Thank you for reminding me, I forgot how it feels when you write things down and share it with friends even if they are virtual.

Best of Luck,

Puppy.

6/05/2006 10:20:00 PM  
Blogger Twosret said...

Puppy,

Is that your baby's picture? or it is your picture when you were a baby? I would worry much more to post this picture :) then the possibility of anyone finding Loulou's blog. Just kidding :) I'm not a privacy freak but I think I would worry too about Loulou :)


T.

6/06/2006 01:09:00 AM  
Blogger Just Jane said...

White hair..I'm not so into them, probably because I have quite a few of my own already. Muscled arms, however, are another story...

6/06/2006 04:55:00 AM  
Blogger Puppy said...

Twosret,

This is me in my younger age:) People say there is not that much difference between that pic and me now. For now I don’t worry of posting my pic, since if you will look to my blog there is nothing in there. yet:))

I have read what Loulou said “If ANYONE finds this blog I will kill myself.” So I thought if what she does is that sensitive why she is still doing that and putting herself in a risk, even if it’s manageable in a way. So I kinda was worried for her. But there is a priority thing, which comes up. As for now writing is more important for her “Because it helps me to get things out of my system, organize my thoughts & focus on my daily life” either than the risk which is totally managed now. Whether the situation will change hope she will act accordingly and set her priorities right, which I am sure she will.

Puppy.

6/06/2006 09:06:00 AM  
Blogger Carmen said...

Have constantly gotten into arguments with (normally quite sane) people about sexual frustration in women. "Women can't get sexually frustrated, they're not equipped" and I could never understand how in the world they could justify that. I'm NASTY when I'm frustrated. Will not only GET the headaches, but manage to GIVE them as well to anyone who crosses my path.

6/08/2006 04:50:00 AM  
Blogger LouLou said...

S,

Next time someone tells you women don't get sexually frustrated, ask them to define the term "sexually aroused" then take it from there. Anyone who thinks women don't get sexually aroused don't waste your time with. They probably wouldn't know what sex is.

This is worse than the idiots who say women don't care about looks in their partner, only men get attracted to looks i.e. women are blind.

These people probably think women don't bleed when you cut them or something.

Good to know am not the only one who gets the headaches;)

6/08/2006 11:30:00 PM  
Blogger Libyan Violet said...

I don't get the headaches :) all I get is an incredible longing ..does that count ;)

6/09/2006 08:13:00 PM  
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