Thursday, May 18, 2006

Yesterday & Today

Yesterday

Me: Are you trying to upset me?
Him: No I can't afford to upset you.
Me: Why not?
Him: I like to eat & I like to get laid. Both on a regular basis.
Me: K?
Him: 3iyoon K.(A term of endearment meaning am dearer to him than his eyesight.)
Me: What did other women ever see in you?
Him: It would take me so long to tell you that you wouldn't have time to cook my dinner.
Me(rolling my eyes): That's it? That's all I mean to you?
Him: Howa feeh ba3d kida?(What more do you want?) You women don't know your own power.
Me: After all we've been through? After everything I did for you?
Him: Ah sa7ee7 mana(Yeah right and me) I never did anything for you.
Me: The man I love. The man I gave my heart to. And he just wants me for food & sex.
Him(groaning): Ya di elneila.(Not sure how to translate this. I guess it means oh damn.)
Me: Mnain ajeeb i7sas lily ma yi7is(A line from an Arabic song meaning where do I get feeling for someone who lacks feeling.). Ya bani adam lail nahar aqoolak a7ib ilard illy timshi 3laiha(Day & night I tell you I love the ground you walk on) & this is what I get?
Him: Imta da?(When was that?) Ana awil mara asma3 elkalam da.(That's the first I've heard of this)
Me: What?!!I tell I love you all the time you ungrateful bastard!
Him: La bas elshwiya elakhraneen dol gamdeen.(Yeah but that last bit was too much.) 7ilwa 7kayit elard wilbalat di(I like this ground stuff.).
Me: Khalas yassidi....
(Yassidi means "my lord/master" but it's used in casual conversation to be polite I guess & no one takes it that way.)
Him(cutting me off): Yassidi?(Out of sheer perversity he chooses to take it that way) La(no). Inti t2ooli 7adir, t2ooli na3am bas yassidi la(You tell me "yes" or "your wish is my command" but not yassidi). Mardahalkeesh(I wouldn't ask that of you).
Me: Shut up.

His cell rings. And I hear him tell someone: Wala 7aga(Oh nothing). Mirati 3amala t7ib feeya min taraf wa7id(My wife is indulging in one-sided love with me). La da min tarafha hiya(It's all from her side).

Me(trying to grab the phone from him but he's holding away): Meen?!!(who?)

We keep struggling & in the end he gives me the phone. I say hello & it's his brother.

His bro: 2ooliloh gatak khaibah.

Please O Ground open up & swallow me!!!


Today

At a conference in the Emirates Plaza. We break for lunch. Am sitting in the lobby blogging on my laptop. I get up to go use the bathroom. When I come back some guy has my laptop in one hand & is picking up the case with the other. I go up to him & say excuse me. He says is this yours?I say yes. He says sorry, puts it down & walks off. I think he must be someone who works for the hotel & maybe I was sitting in the wrong place or laptops are not allowed or something. I go ask the receptionist & she says no. I wonder if maybe he got my laptop mixed up with his or something. It's still bugging me so I go back & ask the receptionist. She says no he didn't have a laptop with him, he doesn't work for the hotel and he's not staying. She said he's a walk-in guest.

I walk round looking for him but he's disappeared. I come back before someone else tries to steal my laptop.

Was that it?Was he trying to steal it?Does this sort of thing happen in Abu Dhabi?In a seven-star hotel?

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13 Comments:

Blogger Alina said...

Well, it probably does happen in a seven star hotel where people do not expect to have their things stolen?

As for your conversation with K, very funny! Question: if I don't really cook that much, does it mean someone would only marry me for sex? :D

5/18/2006 03:00:00 PM  
Blogger Maxxed`ouT said...

Joey once said : " I want women on bread " !

5/19/2006 08:22:00 AM  
Blogger LouLou said...

Alina,

"Question: if I don't really cook that much, does it mean someone would only marry me for sex? :D"

Yes. And I guess it means you will have one source of power instead of two. :)

Maxxed Out,

Joey who?

5/19/2006 11:29:00 PM  
Blogger Leilouta said...

Yes he was trying to steal it,and it happens everywhere.
You'll be amazed by what people can steal. My mom's dentist told her once that his own customers stole the outlets out of his waiting room.Can you believe that?!

5/19/2006 11:54:00 PM  
Blogger Safiya said...

A popular phrase about such blantant thieves is:
"They'd steal your eyeballs if you weren't looking"

5/20/2006 02:17:00 AM  
Blogger Maxxed`ouT said...

Joey Tribiani ?
Joey
"Friend" 's Joey ..

5/20/2006 04:09:00 AM  
Blogger Maxxed`ouT said...

They asked him if he had to give up food or sex .. what would he choose .
He said he wants his women on bread !

5/20/2006 04:10:00 AM  
Blogger tota said...

you shouldn’t trust ppl even in 7 stars hotel, not coz they are classy and rich this means they won't steal ... sometimes it's a psychological habit, and it’s easier to be done, if all ppl will think it’s impossible to happen in such places!

Maxxed ... i do Like Friends, but didnt get who is that Joey too ... Joey is always hilarious lol

5/20/2006 05:22:00 AM  
Blogger Gilgamish said...

hey Loulou 7abeebti,

I am back and I just wana drop a line and say hi, and thankgoodness you recovered your laptop.

take care for now :)

5/20/2006 06:32:00 AM  
Blogger Alina said...

Lou, it is official, he said it...That is my only weapon :D And for now, the fact that I can google stuff for him in Romanian :DD

5/20/2006 10:01:00 AM  
Blogger LouLou said...

Gilgamish!

Welcome back 7abibti!Where have you been?We thought you got bored with blogging & abandoned us?

Alina,

Maybe the Romanian googling can make up for your lack of culinary skills?

Maxxed Out,

Women on bread is funny. I'm curious if you agree though? If you had to give up food or sex?

tota,

Well it's unexpected in Abu Dhabi in general. This is such a safe city. In Emirates Plaza it's DEFINITELY unexpected. But I've learnt my lesson. I hate getting robbed.

Safiya,

"They'd steal your eyeballs if you weren't looking"

That's funny. Yeah the guy had some nerve didn't he?

Leilouta,

"My mom's dentist told her once that his own customers stole the outlets out of his waiting room.Can you believe that?! "

Wow Really? My husband is a dentist. I'd better tell him to watch out!

5/20/2006 02:47:00 PM  
Blogger Maxxed`ouT said...

Why would i have to give up anything to start with ?!
But if i had to i guess i'd give up sex .
I love to stuff my face and i'm not gettin' any as it is alright .
So yeah ...

5/20/2006 10:21:00 PM  
Blogger LouLou said...

Maxxed Out,

Relax. You don't have to give up anything. Just wanted to see what you'd say. I said that didn't I?

5/21/2006 12:12:00 PM  

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