Me : Inta wain mwadeeni?(Where are you taking me?)
Him: Ana bardo illy mwadeeki?Da ana mashi waraki.(I am not.You're taking me/I'm following you.)
Me : Seriously where are we going?
Him: Zay ma t7ibi.(As you like.)
Me : Let's go to Marina mall.
Him(with a look of absolute horror on his face): The mall?Why?
Me : Mi7taja nadara ya K.(I need a pair of sunglasses)
Him: Ya nhari. Nadara? Da ana ageeblik elma7al kollo. (Basically he's saying my wish is his command and he would buy me an entire store of sunglasses if I wanted etc....Arabic flattery)
Me : La. Nadara wa7ida takfi. Yalla nroo7 elmall.(No. One pair is enough. Let's go to the mall.)
Him: Wihiya ya3ni elnadara lazim filmall?(But do we have to go to the mall for sunglasses?)
Me: Khalas ya 7abibi(It's ok baby ) ana I'll get it some other time.
Him: La ana ma7rimkeesh min 7aga(No I don't want to deprive you of anything). Bas ana ba2ool ya3ni ay ma7al nadarat yib2a akhaf min elmall.(All I'm saying is we can go to any optician's intead of going to the mall). Elwahid mish biyla2i(One can never find) parking and we'll be walking around there all evening.
Of course that was the whole point for me. I want to go window-shopping in the mall, walk around, see what else I might like, maybe pick up one or two other things etc...Exactly what he was trying to avoid.
So we go into Yateem Optics in Hamdan Street and in no time at all, I have my new pair of sunglasses and even a pair of brown contacts to go with my new haircolor.
But somehow am frustrated, not satisfied with my purchases. I would have enjoyed getting exactly the same things from the mall a lot more.
Why did I ever agree to let him drive us? When will I learn that when we go out together and it involves shopping I should always insist that we take my car?
So back in the car:
Him: Ha ti7ibi troo7i fain dilwa2ti?(So where would you like to go now?)
Me : Let's go for sheesha in Hiltonia. It's nice today. We can sit outside and look at the sea.
Him: Sheesha wi ba7r mashi(Sheesha by the sea is fine). Bas balash Hiltonia(But not Hiltonia).
Me : Laish?(Why?)
Him: Too many people you know.
Me : Tayeb ya3ni mara martain nsalim wo khalas.(So we'll say hello a couple of times and that's it.)
Him: Aiwa bas elmakan daya2 kida wana bisara7a batkhini2(Yeah but the place is too small and I find it suffocating).
I love Hiltonia. Have been going there practically all my life.
Me(between gritted teeth) : La salamtak(Arabic endearment meaning May Allah keep you safe - from suffocation in this case) ya 7abibi. Where would you prefer to go for sheesha?
Him: La ana ta7t amrik bas balash wilnabi (I'm at your service but for the love of the Prophet not Hiltonia)Hiltonia.
Him: Yi7adir lik elkhair.(Don't know how to translate that.)
So I start rattling off the names of all the sheesha places in Abu Dhabi. Two of them he doesn't like because they're not by the sea. One he doesn't like because the chairs have no handles and he doesn't know what to do with his arms when sitting there. One is no good because he doesn't like the music they play.
In end he decides that we'll just drive along the new Corniche until we find a place where he'd like to sit. I decide to keep my mouth shut.
We get to a place somewhere near the end of Alkasir. He parks the car & I get out without a word. It's a nice place. I don't mind it at all. What I do mind is that it was clear he didn't just stumble on it like he was pretending to, that it was where he'd wanted to come all along.
Every single time we go out, he gives me this crap like mashi waraki(following you) and ta7t amrik(at your service) and in the end we do what he wants. If he doesn't like a place or an activity then he will have nothing to do with it. Never. He's so stubborn.
I just don't know why he still bothers to sweet-talk me. It doesn't work anymore. It just insults my intelligence.
Who would have guessed that sweet talk could be so irritating?