On Birthdays

K.(to a fellow motorist while driving): Eh ya 3am fi eh?(Hey what's going on?)
Me: Fi eh?Inta elghaltan.(What do you mean what's going on?It's your fault not his.)
K.: Kida ya LouLou?Bitbi3eeni?(You're selling me out?)
Me: No I just think you're driving sucks today.
K.: Tayeb mana 3andi fikra hatraya7ik witraya7ni(Ok I have a great idea). Ma teegi inti tsoo2i.(Why don't you drive?) Madam inti shatra awi kida.(Since you're so good.)
Me: Let's go get my car & I'll race you.
K.: Race mara wa7da?Hatkhushi ma3aya rally?(He's scoffing at the idea that a feeble female might actually win a car race with him.)
Me: Yeah.
K.: Tab mat-khushi ma3aya 7aga tanya.
Me: What?Scared you're gonna lose?
K.: No, you're gonna lose. I drive better & my car is faster. It wouldn't be fair.
Me: Your car is just new. Mine is mature.
K.: Mature?7ilwa di(That's nice).
Me: Don't make fun of my car. Manta badal ma you get me a new car you got yourself a motorbike.
K.: Eh lazmito ba2a ela2ar di?Inti 2olti 3ayza 3arabiya wana 2olt la?(Did you ask me for a new car?)
Me: No but you could have offered - since you're clearly feeling rich. And my birthday is coming up.
K.: Tayeb ya sitti adi i7na feeha.(Ok I'm offering now) If you want a new car I'll finance it.
Me: Really?Any car?
K.: Within reasonable limits. Ya3ni mish tigeebili 3arabiya binos million.(Don't pick a car worth half a million.)
Me(kissing him): 7abibi. Thank you.
K.: Ay khidma(Anytime). Ha?3ayza 3arabiya model eh ba2a?(So which model do you want?)
Me: No it's ok. I like my car. Besides, if I wanted a new car, I can finance it myself. I finished my loan.
K.: Sob7an allah feeki wi fi tab3ak.Omal kol shwiya bit2atameeni gibt linafsak wi ma gibtish wi ma 3amaltish leh(Then why are you giving me a hard time about what I bought for myself?)?Kol ma asa'alik 3ayza 7aga ti2ooli la 3andi(Everytime I ask you if you need something you say no you don't want anything from me) mish 3ayza minak 7aga. Lama inti mish na2sik 7aga ab2a ana 7or ba2a. (If you have everything you need then I'm free.)Ageeb motorcycle, ageeb tayara ma 7addish loh da3wa beeya(I can get a motorcycle or a private plane, it's no one's business).
Me: I never said mish 3ayza minak 7aga(I never said I don't want anything from you).
K.: You don't have to spell it out. You don't like it when I spend money on you.
Me: Why are you yelling at me?
K.: Ana asif.(I'm sorry)
Me: Wana kaman.(Me too)
K.: Winti kaman eh?(You too what?)
Me: Asfa.(Sorry.)
K.: Tayeb ya sitti asfa mish hat2ooli ba2a 3ayza eh fi 3eed miladik?(So are you going to tell me what you want for your birthday?)
Me: I don't know. Let me think about it.


Seriously, what do I want for my birthday?He wants me to spend his money. By special request. I really should get to work on that.