Tuesday, December 26, 2006

7atem Biy2ool

She is an Egyptian girl I know. Her husband's name is 7atem. She's famous for talking a lot & starting virtually every sentence with the words "7atem biy2ool"(Hatem says). "7atem biy2ool 7alal", "7atem biy2ool 7aram", "7atem biy2ool fi", "7atem biy2ool mafish" etc....You get the idea.

Now we all admire wifely devotion am sure but I mean, the woman is like a broken record.

She does it so much that now many people have taken to calling her "7atem biy2ool". It has become her unofficial nickname - behind her back of course. I didn't though because it struck me as being unkind.

I knew her a very long time ago. We went to grade school together for about 2 years. Then she moved back to Egypt with her parents. She came back here with her husband about 4 years ago. And this world being as small as it is, it turns out that her husband's brother is married to my husband's sister. So now we see them a bit more than we otherwise would because of this family relationship.

My husband & I don't enjoy their company for many reasons but I digress. That's not what this post is about.

Hatem has recently seen fit to start a dirty rumor about me. I first heard about it from who else? His wife herself. She came over once to tell me that Hatem was attending a conference with some colleagues at a local hotel. He saw me sitting in the lobby smoking with a guy. Then when they finished the conference & came down in the lift, I was still in the lobby this time smoking with another guy who happened to be drinking. So Hatem's friends/colleagues thought I was sitting there to pick up guys. And Hatem, being very concerned about my good name, went home & told his wife that she should tell me to be careful & not do things that look so suspicious.

Of course my first reaction to this was to burst out laughing. I had no exact recollection of the incident she was talking about but for sure if I was in a hotel lobby during the daytime, it would have been for business reasons. And if I was sitting with someone then I was sitting with someone else, that would have been for business reasons too. Occasionally when we have these meetings someone will decide to have a glass of wine over lunch or something. Even if I pay attention to what everyone am sitting with is drinking - which I rarely do - am not in a position to be telling either clients or colleagues what they should or should not drink. And finally, the last time I smoked was ages ago so if she & Hatem have been busy thinking I was some kind of man-eating monster for so long then that was just funny.

Except over the last couple of months, I keep hearing the same story from different sources - that Hatem has seen me in a compromising situation. Each time with newer & juicier details - all revolving around the fact that am a "typical Magribiya(Morrocan)". Moroccan girls here are apparently all sluts and frankly, each version I hear is more offensive than the one before.

Last week apparently, Hatem went & told his brother who told his wife who just happens to be my sister-in-law. And my sister-in-law apparently called Hatem & his wife & went absolutely ballistic on them for talking about me etc.....

I am pleasantly surprised. That's my evil sister-in-law we're talking about here. She hates me. I don't expect her to stick up for me. So that's good. What's bad is this whole situation is starting to get to be a bit of a pain. So the question becomes what - if anything - should I do with Hatem & his sidekick- excuse me - his wife?

My instinct is to ignore this sort of thing. But if the story has so far travelled through the Egyptian gravepine from Abu Dhabi to London where my sister-in-law lives then that's a sign that it's not dying out isn't it?



Blogger SaRaH said...

Well I guess you are right it is a bit of a pain and I think you should ignore it. Yes it has travelled to all sorts of locations but somethings should not be even deginified with an answer. MY advice ignore the whole thing.

12/26/2006 06:16:00 PM  
Blogger greyscale said...

i would suggest putting hatem on the spot by asking him who else he's told this story to, besides his wife.

12/27/2006 04:05:00 AM  
Blogger Badr said...

you are Morrocan, i never could've guessed, you seem egyptian through and through, especialy the way you handle your husband...wiered

12/27/2006 04:48:00 AM  
Blogger Puppy said...

The thing that your sister in-law interfered i think she did that for the sake of her brother, your husband, since even here wife is the honor of husband as long as her behavior, so not surprising for me that she interfered.

As for your actions, i think you should ignore, what else you can do? follow everyone Hatem gossiped with and say its not true? However montioning that you are not happy about his action can be reasonably important, altho i am not sure if he got the message from your Sister in law, however repeat wont be useless.

Best wishes,


12/27/2006 12:36:00 PM  
Blogger LouLou said...


"MY advice ignore the whole thing."

Yes I think that's what I'll do.


"i would suggest putting hatem on the spot by asking him who else he's told this story to,"

Do you think he'd tell me the truth? And if he did tell me, then what should I do?


"you are Morrocan, i never could've guessed,"

Yes I am.:)

"The thing that your sister in-law interfered i think she did that for the sake of her brother"

I know that. But it's still nice of her.

I just hope she doesn't tell my husband. I know exactly what his response to this sort of thing will be. He'll go beat the guy up. Then he'll tell me to ignore it, that he doesn't care what people say. But he'll go into a bad mood for ages because even though he doesn't like to admit it, he DOES care what people say. Especially other Egyptians.

And frankly, I've had enough drama in my life & now I'm ready for some peace & quiet. Our anniversary is coming up. I don't want anything to mess it up.

Why can't people just shut up & mind their own business?

12/27/2006 03:38:00 PM  
Blogger greyscale said...

if he does tell the truth then you should make him feel sorry for spreading rumors about you.

but like you said, that's pretty unlikely...hmm..

ok i guess you can just ignore the whole thing like syehia said.

12/27/2006 04:11:00 PM  
Blogger Puppy said...

When ppl have nothing to do - they talk, after they have nothing to talk about - they gossip. Gossip in order to firm up and show everyone "how good they are" and how inappropriate the other ppl are.
You are being confident, seeing nothing wrong in talking to your colleagues, business partners, who drinks and etc (where i totally agree with u), while Hatem cant fit this in his small mind, and what he does? He goes around and gossiping about you, trying to satisfy his little mind and find same-thinkers, when he doesnt find he goes further, when he finds he still searches for more, so he can show others that he has "HIGH" morality compared to "You". Simply as that.

just ignore. Khalass :) and happy anniversary.



12/27/2006 05:25:00 PM  
Blogger Carmen said...

Take Hatem and his parrot wife to a remote area and pulp them both to the ground. I can send you "Kill Bill" for ideas on how to eliminate them. Or, better yet, let me come and beat them for you. I've got energy to let out.

Effen bastards. Egyptians are just so.......friggin...............annoying. It's unbelievable the shit they do. I apologize profusely for my can't mind their own business kind lou lou.

12/27/2006 05:54:00 PM  
Blogger Haroun El Poussah said...

Tsk Tsk Tsk, hotel lobbies? Talking to strangers? What's next? Phone calls from men?

12/27/2006 06:47:00 PM  
Blogger roora said...

i am actually angry. They are trying to advice you but the best they can do beside the advice is stop talking shewya and spreading the story among everyone they know. It reminds me with bad rumors that are spread out of nothing without paying too much attention that they are hurting people by this kind of talk.

" waa t7seebonah hayenan waa howa 3nd Allah 3theeman"

You have to put and confront Hatem and his wife that they should have limits and to mind their own business. Thanks for their advice to you. But no meaning to say it for every one.

12/28/2006 12:20:00 AM  
Blogger Mumbo Jumbo said...

It wouldn't really solve anything but I would have an urge to confront Hatem and 'Hatem beykool'!

On the other hand, it might get blown out of proportion and it'll surely reach your husband and ruin your plans for some peace.

Ugh... bastards.

12/28/2006 01:10:00 PM  
Blogger Safiya said...

"If someone speaks false of you, don't bother to reply. If someone speaks the truth of you, storm and swear they lie"
Dorothy Parker

Seriously, to people who want to think such bad things of you, nothing you can say will stop this. Just avoid/ignore them, if at all possible.

12/28/2006 09:59:00 PM  

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