Wednesday, November 14, 2007


So we ARE cutting down on phone time. He did, actually. Last night I called & called but he wouldn't pick up. He'd told me not to call because he wasn't going to pick up but I didn't think he'd actually DO it.

Of course, I totally understand the logic. We were spending way, way too much money on phone calls.

And speaking for myself, he's not the only person I regularly talk to long-distance either. I talk to my family, too.

And well, no need to go over my financial situation again. Suffice it to say, I can't afford this.

We could use the internet to keep in touch, of course, but my parents are both completely computer illiterate & planning to stay that way. And my husband thinks voice chat is for teenagers. He simply will not do it.

This morning, in the office, I'm thinking that this is the first time I've had to wake up without having more or less fallen asleep on the phone with him since he left. Even if it ended with a fight & me hanging up on him (he still never hangs up on me). Still it was better than nothing.

I am trying to shake off the gloom but it sort of feels like him leaving all over again.

In other news, I can't get way from work for another month at least. And the Swedish visit visa I currently hold expires in 3 days. I will need to apply for a new one. And that worries me because am currently under processing for immigration. If they haven't decided yet whether K & I are really married, will they want to give me a visit visa? The impression I get is that they expect me to wait until the process is complete & not try to cut corners etc....Would they consider going to visit him cutting corners? I don't know.

A vendor we work with has offered to get me a letter of invitation to visit one of his principles in Sweden. But it's a completely different part of Sweden from where my husband lives. I'd have to visit the people I got my invitation from first. Don't know how long that will last.

Again, if I visit for business reasons, would that be considered 'cutting corners'?

On the bright side, I really, really like my new manager - although I do miss the old one who had to retire for health reasons. The guy I report to now is an absolute sweetheart. Not in a soft, sissy kind of way. I just like him because he's so fair & anti-sexual-discrimination & supportive & protective of his staff. He gets as angry as I do when am discriminated against by colleagues, clients, vendors etc....unlike the old manager who would just shrug & say 'fact-of-life' or something. This one will NOT tolerate it, and has already succeeded once in getting people to back down from their sexist practices. That's in a situation where I personally wouldn't have bothered to fight it because I'd come to accept it as inevitable.

About time, too. This firm needs someone like him to change the corporate culture. Too bad he only showed up when am about to leave though.

My new boss is a former US Marine btw. He comes across as your stereotypical American. Strong, fairminded, straight-talker with lots of integrity. And he really never uses the pronouns 'you' or 'I'. It's just 'we' - all the time. I'd heard before that managers are supposed to do that but never actually met anyone who does it so religiously.

On the downside, he's very serious. No sense of humor. And a slavedriver so I've been having to work harder than ever because you don't want to get off on the wrong foot with a new boss, do you?

God, sometimes it's hard to think I'm leaving so soon. Am one of the 'old-timers' here. So many people here are not full-time staff. They're brought in from overseas on temporary consultancy contracts. So many people have come & gone while I stayed. Even my manager's gone. I thought I was the one who would always be here.



Blogger Um Naief said...

americans can be slave drivers. it's pretty much the culture in the u.s. when you're in a high position... but usually it's the women who do this and not the men. altho, seeing he's an ex-marine, i can understand it.

i don't know what it is, but we're taught, when we enter the job market, that you have to be like this to succeed... and seeing that he was in the marines, well.. you have it doubly bad! ;)

but... i'm sure he'll be fair in everything and won't change his attitude and way or handling situations no matter what.

11/18/2007 10:06:00 AM  

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