Facials
The lady who does my facial every month is absolutely brilliant. She has magical hands. I've been going to her for years once a month & again if I have a party or a special occasion.
However the last 2 sessions(one today) with her were a little disturbing. While she is working on my face, she starts telling me all the intimate details of her physical relationship with her husband. I mean it. That's all she talks about. Not nice romantic girl talk about how they met or how they fell in love. Infact I still don't know how they met.
Now this is especially embarrassing because I know her husband. We work together. It would have been embarrassing enough to have to listen to this about a complete stranger - but about someone I know & have to see everyday?Thanks but no thanks. Too much data.
I let the first time pass but today I decided to tell her something. So I waited until my face was no longer at her mercy & I tried to explain as politely as possible that it makes me uncomfortable when she gets so graphic. She went red & was clearly offended but she said that she wouldn't have said anything if she didn't know I was getting married soon so she thought I would benefit from what she had to say! Then she went on about how I shouldn't be embarrassed & should get used to this stuff etc...
I was speechless with shock at the nerve! But only for a couple of seconds. Then I lost my temper, told her that she was completely out of line, that the client's marital status is none of her business & it's not her job to get involved in our private life & that if she ever does it again I will speak to the manager.
That shut her up. And I was satisfied for a while until I realized that I just lost a great therapist. After this there's no way I'll trust her to touch my face again. She looked so angry I'll bet she'd burn my face off if she got a chance!
posted by LouLou @ 12:34 AM
18 Comments:
okay,
i am sorry for being rude on jade's blog...
i never read this post of yours ofcourse as it just started with 'facials'.. no place for me..
exactly like my blog, its no place for you.. :)
anyhow..
tc
Good morning m0tasim,
Thank you. Nice gesture. No need to be sorry. Am not offended anymore. I was at first to be honest because yesterday of all days I had to work from 7:00am to 7:00pm without even a break for lunch. So imagine at the end of a day like that I find someone saying it's easy for girls to succeed!Of course am going to take out all the stress of the whole day on him.:)
But it's a new day & I had some sleep & when I read the whole argument again now it is just funny.:)
Welcome to my blog btw. I don't always post about facials.:)Infact this post isn't really about facials despite the title. It's about another issue.
But if you don't want me to visit your blog khalas I won't.:)
Loulou,
I would have died listening to this lady. She must be nuts!
There are so many good therapists that gives sex stories free facials :) I wouldn't go back even if she wasn't that angry.
Plus, who said that married ladies should be vulgar?.
I think Japanese ladies are the best in facials and they are extremely polite.
Ouch lou!
that was very harsh :)
i honestly, absolutely hate it when the lady working on me for whatever reason starts talking, period. If its more than the casual hellos and how are yous i start feeling not so relaxed.
I like to be pampered in peace, not only because i will have to answer back, but also they start asking questions that i dont want to answer and saying things im in no way interested in.
But talking about her sex life so explicitly is way beyond my understanding, its way too much, i wouldnt have the same reaction like you, but i wish i would though :)
Good that you decided no to go to her again, there are plenty of other therapists, i could've pinted out a couple for you, but they're here in Dubai :)
But let me ask you this, if you didnt know the husband, would you've had the same reaction?
:S I can't believe how ppl can talk about their very private life that open!!! totally unacceptable.
Glad u reacted this way...if I were in ur place I wouldn't have said anything...I'll just be shocked..and won't go to that place again.
You are right about feeling uncomfortable about this lady telling you all those graphic details ,I know a female friend who is always complaining that her supervisor(female) in the school she works in always talking about private matters to her ,although it didn't include any graphic details or something but my friend felt very sick of having to hear these private things about her supervisor's problems and life issues ,now every time her supervisor starts to talk she will execuse herself out of the room.
To be fair Ithink you over reacted to this woman ,you should have told her to stop talking and you don't need her advices at all ,she may be really thought that this is normal and you would be benefetting from her stories ,unfortunately alot of people around the world thinks that this is the ideal way to prepare the new bride for marriage! ,that's her mentality so please don't be angry ,
well thanx for your kindness, its so good to know u are welcomed anywhere.. so thanx again.
from 7 to 7 huh? well loulou sometimes did come when i had to work 5 days continuously with no sleep at all.. if i sat down on a chair for 3 hours and had a little doze, that was my weeks' sleep..
but 10 more days on this and it will be over.. details are on my blog which u are not welcomed btw.. ! not because if anything that has to do with you, bbut just that my blog is a bit offensive.. one way or another..
anyways, see u later..
and btw, i knew and understood what u said from the very beginning, i just like to make fun of it all and provoke u girls to talk yourselves out.. i know girls are as good working as men are, a little slow though and ofcourse when there isnt some real manual work to be done.. like coal mining :) .. but u girls really do good stuff... i like your handwritings though.. so clean! ,
yalla.. i gotta go for 10days,
tc!
Twosret,
"Plus, who said that married ladies should be vulgar?."
Yes it was very vulgar. Not to mention excruciatingly embarrassing. Like walking in on a couple in their bedroom.
Chari,
"But let me ask you this, if you didnt know the husband, would you've had the same reaction?"
It would still be embarrassing but less so I guess. And I wouldn't feel embarrassed everytime I see him.
But the reason I lost my temper with her was that she actually had the nerve to think she can give me advice on something like that. Ya3ni it was embarrassing when she was talking about herself but it was her life in the end. But to think she can talk about me that way she was pushing it. Big-time. The way she was talking it was as if she was expecting me to tell her stories too or come to her with my questions!
Rain,
"I'll just be shocked..and won't go to that place again.
"
But then she won't know what she did wrong or why you didn't come back. I think it was important that someone set her straight so she doesn't do it to other clients.
Night,
"To be fair Ithink you over reacted to this woman ,"
This is the second or the third time you've thought I over-reacted to something. Am getting the impression that you're a very calm, collected, wise person who always thinks first before he speaks. Am curious though do you ever over-react?
I usually try to be diplomatic & think how to say things in the best way. That's part of being a Libra. But unfortunately I have a temper that sometimes spoils things.:( Especially if something is unexpected & comes as a shock am not prepared for. Then I lose my temper & react first & think later.:(
m0tasim,
"well loulou sometimes did come when i had to work 5 days continuously with no sleep at all.. if i sat down on a chair for 3 hours and had a little doze, that was my weeks' sleep.."
Well at least no one tells you you have it easy. If they did I don't think you will like it after working so hard.:)
"details are on my blog which u are not welcomed btw.. !"
Don't worry. I never go anywhere without an invitation.
Lou, thanks for your nice greeting and being happy for me.
As for the lady actually religous point of view, this is very wrong and Haram that she says the details of her relation with her husband and she should know that , and about helping you , I heared that this could be allowed for maried couples but not narrating on her self as a case , saying the general knowledge that any might need without refering to something personal as much as she can. And i saw some doing that and it wasnt ebarassing by then bec. they weren't refering to themselves.
And definitely the advice should be taken when some one asks for!
hi loulou,
I really hate it when the people working on me start chitchatting. But in your case, it is more than chitchat!!! Unfortunately, there are many people like this woman these days. They find it normal to talk about there intimate life!!! I experienced a situation like this 6 years ago. I was a newly married, and the wife of my husband's colleague started talking like that. I played the fool, I pretended not to understand her hints. She laughed and told me that I am still young and bokra 7atifhamy (tomorrow you'll understand)!!! I hated the woman that day!!
I think this woman acted very unprofessionally. She is not your girlfriend or female relative and therefore should not be sharing such intimacies nor trying to give you advice on a topic of this nature. I'm not sure if I would have handled the situation any differently but can understand your frustration.
in the hands of therapists, you are literally at their mercy as you say, to fill you ears with absolute crap! beginning from the hairdresser to the denstist! (No offense to K, remember i am a dentist - and i some times make the mistake of chitchatting through my work, to keep myself awake! but i would not make them uncomfortable in any way)
you were right to tell her off, though to see the other side of the story; her social standard is obviously way diferent than yours, and for her, maybe this talk is nice and friendly.
difficult to deal with her husband now i bet. don't worry about your facials. if she is professional, she won't hurt you, just give it a couple of months for things to cools off.
Off topic: LOL Loulou.. Chari was right ... I've been away for a couple of days and I find 3 new posts ...we can't keep up with you !!! Hehehe...
roora,
"As for the lady actually religous point of view, this is very wrong and Haram that she says the details of her relation with her husband and she should know that"
I guess she doesn't.
"And definitely the advice should be taken when some one asks for!"
Exactly!I only went there for a facial.
Wonderer,
"I played the fool, I pretended not to understand her hints."
Well you're lucky she was hinting. This one was saying everything out in the open. No way to pretend to misunderstand her.
Jane,
"She is not your girlfriend or female relative and therefore should not be sharing such intimacies nor trying to give you advice on a topic of this nature."
Do you think that even a relative or a girlfriend should be giving unsolicited advice on that sort of thing?People should wait until you ask them instead of surprising you by invading your privacy like that.
You're right of course. She was very presumptuous & unprofessional.
doshar,
"n the hands of therapists, you are literally at their mercy as you say, to fill you ears with absolute crap! beginning from the hairdresser to the denstist!"
Actually Doshar I can't stand dentists who don't talk!Strange contradiction isn't it?I get terrified if the dentist doesn't keep up a running commentary, telling me exactly everything he or she is doing every second. And I do appreciate when they try to reassure me or give me pep talks because I am really afraid of being in that chair.
But naturally I wouldn't appreciate them saying anything too personal or embarrassing.
Meme,
"we can't keep up with you !!! Hehehe..."
Told ya so;)
7amdillah 3ala slamtik.
For that reason I hate hairdressers, though those I go to don't go to that extent, but I just don't like their talking. I feel embaressed from small things!
(This is the second or the third time you've thought I over-reacted to something. Am getting the impression that you're a very calm, collected, wise person who always thinks first before he speaks. Am curious though do you ever over-react?)
LOL...I hope that you are not annoyed or something ,and I am not this calm person at all ,many people sees me as nervous person and others sees me a moderate calm person ,and sometimes I over react but I regrett it when I think about it later ,but it's different when you have to deal with other people concerns ,problems or giving advices to them ,you have time toanalyze the situation and give your advice in person or post a reply as it is the case here in blogs ,that's the difference between dealing with your own issues and dealing with other's issues.
Night,
"LOL...I hope that you are not annoyed or something"
No am not annoyed. Am impressed.
"that's the difference between dealing with your own issues and dealing with other's issues."
You're right. We all know just what to do when it's someone else's problem but when we are in the same situation we're less sure. I guess the expression "do as I say not as I do" is always right.:)
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